'Just Be'

Learning to Listen When Life Gets Loud

How’s your week been? Mine has been glorious because, as you know, I nipped off to Cyprus for a week with Austen.

We stayed at the Leonardo Cypria Maris Beach Hotel & Spa in a deluxe sea view room and it was idyllic.

And the seven day trip turned into something much deeper than a bit of sun and relaxation.

Knowing which way to turn

Working in live TV News, you’re constantly processing information, delivering it clearly, staying cool, calm and collected.

But sometimes life delivers news that shifts your sands, leaving you unexpectedly scrambling for the time and space to work out what it all means.

For me that news was about a lifelong dream that now feels like it’s drifting away.

I’m at a crossroads. Not entirely sure if I should fight to hold onto that dream - or let it go, and see what path or paths opens up instead.

Good food, conversations, music and visitations

Our gorgeous all-inclusive seafront hotel, the intense heat (it got up to 32 deg C BTW), a delicious Steak dinner at The Rib Shack, lovely a la carte meals (lordy I’ve put on weight!), and our long walks across the bays - to not one but TWO real ale bars in Paphos Harbour - each and every piece of the Cyprian tapestry contributed to the thinking, the talking, and yet more thinking.

Sweet & sour chicken at Ego Asian Restaurant at our hotel

Big thanks to The Wooden Pub with its fab 80s music (thrilled to hear the Pet Shop Boys on our first afternoon) and the quaint Old Fishing Shack, along the backstreets.

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And you know how certain songs can transport you instantly? Do you have one of those tracks that hits differently now – the ones that used to bring joy but now carry weight? For me it’s this

One afternoon by the hotel pool - always stacked with guests sunning themselves - this song came on and everything shifted.

It always makes me think of my late brother Fitz, and today is the third anniversary of his funeral.

I didn’t run inside to get away from hearing it. Instead Austen comforted me and we listened to it. He reckons it was Fitz’s way of giving me a heavenly hug. And I truly believe that.

From Tears to unexpected Joy

We stumbled upon a surprise as we meandered through the backstreets from the Old Fishing Stack back to the bay - the annual Kataklysmos Festival.

It signifies the Pentecost, Whit Monday, and that 50 days have passed since Easter.

The streets along the seafront were absolutely teeming with locals & their families, the air thick with street food aromas and genuine celebration. It was breathtaking.

And instead of ploughing through the crowds we circumvented the main drag, and stopped to soak it all up - not least because the humidity was super intense.

Watching the throngs from the sidelines was a buzz.

But just stopping in that Mediterranean heat made me think about just ‘being’.

Sometimes the most courageous thing you can do is stop trying to have all the answers.

But what happens when you’re tired of reinventing yourself?

You might spend weeks wrestling with a decision, trying to logic your way to clarity. I have.

Well-meaning people say 'You've got this’ and ‘You’ll bounce back' before anything else. But I feel that dismisses the hurt you're feeling.

I’ve had people say this to me these last few weeks. Thankfully I’ve got a great leveller in Austen. He’s a voice of reason.

And I’ve also learned to give myself grace, and not act like the strong Black woman everyone expects me to be or thinks I am. Chiefly because the reality is there are a lot of days when I am not that girl.

I’ve grown to accept that processing emotions - before making plans - is essential for your mental health.

It’s just a shame it’s taken me to get to 53 years old to appreciate that!

Although staying in the hurt for too long is not the best course of action, either.

And even though I've been good at reading the professional landscape through self-awareness, right now facing this curveball that same awareness tells me I don't have to decide everything today.

I’ve had a few ideas. And I’m hoping some more answers will come, even if they don’t turn out to be the ‘right’ ones.

A final thought

Listen to what your gut is telling you, even when it’s whispering rather than shouting. Even if that says today ‘Do nothing’

Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is absolutely nothing, except exist fully in whatever moment you’re in.

And clarity doesn't always come from thinking harder – sometimes it comes from thinking less.

Do you have a process for sitting with uncertainty? Have you ever had to choose between fighting for a dream or letting it go to find a new path?

Drop us all a comment because your wisdom might be exactly what someone else needs to read today!!

Until next week, take care of yourself.

Love

Marv

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